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A SIGN OF THE TIMES: COMMUNICATING WITH YOUR BABY
Printed in The Family Post: School Issue 2002
by Amy Bricmont-Tarczy
Most parents, at one time or another, have been heard to exclaim, "If only she could talk! If only he could tell me what he needed, or what is bothering him!." The scene is familiar to almost all of us. A frantic, screaming baby... a frantic, tearful mother. The infant's volume increases with every second his "request" goes unfulfilled. The mother's blood pressure skyrockets accordingly. Frustration turns to rage, for both parties. Baby is infuriated at not having it's need met. Mom is left a quivering, raw nerve left only with the capacity to wonder why anyone becomes a parent. It is most certainly not the ideal, peaceful mother and child fantasy most of us envisioned as we daydreamed through our first pregnancies.
Fortunately, recent research strongly suggests that a new trend in parent/infant communication can have nothing but a positive impact on the way scenarios such as the above play out. For years, the deaf community has known that babies can learn to communicate through the use of sign language before they begin talking. Now, tens of thousands of non-deaf babies are using a form of sign language, based on American Sign Language, to convey their thoughts, needs and desires.
In the late 1980's, graduate researcher Joseph Garcia began examining the process of learning and teaching signs to babies. He was inspired while visiting the family of a deaf friend. He observed that their ten month old was communicating with his parents in a much more advanced manner than most other babies of the same age. Through his research, he discovered a couple of things.
One, signing with your infant will not stunt their verbal growth. In fact, it seems to have the opposite effect. Because parents who sign tend to repeat the words they are signing more frequently, the verbal development of these children is slightly accelerated. Each word is reinforced through hearing it spoken, visually (by seeing the gesture and facial expression of the parent) and kinesthetically, (by producing the physical gesture themselves).
Signing also seems to strengthen the parent/child bond. Although that is a difficult outcome to quantify, it is not hard to imagine that parents and babies who are communicating without suffering through crying and screaming fits will enjoy one another much more. Time together will be more peaceful. They will be able to concentrate on loving one another, rather than battling to get through to each other.
Garcia cautions against harboring unrealistic expectations. As with anything, there are always a handful of people who become extreme in their enthusiasm. He clearly states that he advocates "augmenting your spoken language with signs." Try not to over-anticipate your babies needs. Let them absorb the signing process, allow them time to internalize it and then to begin using it.
There are those who challenge the idea that babies are really using signs. Some believe parents are merely acknowledging normal non-verbal cues. However, the difference is really quite obvious to most parents. As Beth Raitt, of Denver Colorado remarked, amused at the skeptics, "My son's natural non-verbal cue when he wanted more of something included screaming until his face turned purple. When we began to sign with him the cue became a hand gesture. It was a huge difference." Raitt and her husband turned to signing when their first child, Logan, exhibited a low frustration threshold. At the slightest inability to make his needs and desires known, he screamed and screamed. Desperate, the Raitt's decided to try signing with Logan. They started in his tenth month and were amazed and relieved by the results. He learned quickly and almost immediately, life became easier for everyone in their family. It's hard to argue with that kind of success.
It is possible to teach babies to sign from as early as eight months. You
can begin earlier, but keep in mind that a baby needs to develop memory, manual dexterity and the ability to retain, recognize and produce the signs. It is also never too late to begin signing with your baby. For parents with a difficult baby, signing could be a godsend. It has been suggested by child development experts that the improved communication between parent and child can alleviate the tendency to abuse or neglect. The long term implications of improved early communication can only be guessed at, but common sense tells us we will have a much more pleasant relationship with our children if the early years are not spent at war.
Research at Ohio State University laboratory school has affirmed the theory that teaching babies to sign could significantly reduce the frustration level they experience when they cannot verbalize their needs. It also reduces the frustration level of the parent. According to Kimberlee Whaley, associate professor of human development and family science at Ohio State's College of Human Ecology, signing is "a great way for infants to express their needs before they can verbalize them."
For more information on signing with your baby, there are several resources available.
Joseph Garcia, a pioneer in the area of baby signing offers a "Sign with Your Baby" learning kit. It includes a training video, a 109 page book and a quick reference guide. You can order this by calling 1-877-SIGN 2 ME (1-877-744-6263).
Some websites with information on baby signing that may be helpful in deciding whether this is for you are:
If you just can't take one more go around
with a screaming infant, please, investigate baby signing further. It
could make all the difference in your family and in your future relationship
with your child.
Amy Bricmont-Tarczy is a freelance writer and proud mother of 3-year old daughter Ella. She can be contacted by e-mail at EllaMama@aol.com.
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